Don't Say Itch!
by Literaturefangirl
Summary: A missing scene from 'Til Death Do Us Part' where the team is rescued by paramedics and Face annoys everyone at the hospital complaining about his itchy foot.


When the call had come in from the county sheriff about a helicopter crash on the edge of the county border, the paramedic did not expect to find such a scene.

In a stream, running across the county border was a KTCE news helicopter. After wading through cold, ankle deep waters to reach the helicopter, the paramedic noticed a multi-coloured piece of fabric plugged into its side, alongside two bullet holes. The fabric no doubt used to slow the leaking of fuel from the engine. Just what exactly had this news crew gotten themselves into that would result in multiple bullet holes and a crash landing in the middle of a stream? The paramedic was about to find out.

Sliding open the door of the helicopter, the occupants of the aircraft were revealed to be two unconscious men and women, and a fifth man who appeared to be unharmed.

"What happened here?" The paramedic asked the burly man, hoping he could shed some light on this unfortunate accident.

"The crazy fool crashed the helicopter. That's what happened." B.A set the record straight with his own biased retelling of the event that took place. While it was true that the helicopter had crashed, it was through no fault of Murdock's. But the paramedic had no way of knowing that…

"Crazy _fool_?" The paramedic inquired, alarmed by the description.

"Murdock. The pilot." B.A clarified. "That sucker ain't fit to fly no helicopter." He added, which only served to make the paramedic even more uneasy. Had this helicopter been flown by a mentally unstable, unlicensed pilot? His impression of the situation seemed to be getting worse and worse, the more he found out about it.

Moving to the front of the helicopter, the paramedic opened the door where he found Murdock, unmoving. Arms slumped down, face pressed against the console. The man certainly looked the part of a pilot, wearing a leather bomber jacket. Perhaps the surly looking man's description of him, was one born out of anger and not an accurate description of his mental state.

He'd never get to know, of course. The man could be crazy, or he could be the best _sane_ pilot around. The medical technician's job was to get people to the hospital, so they could receive the medical care they needed and sometimes that meant not getting answers. But it least it made for some wild stories to share.

Entering the cockpit and stepping over a seat to get nearer to his patient, the paramedic pressed two fingers to Murdock's neck to check his pulse. He detected a rapid heart rate; a symptom that the man was in shock from the impact of the crash.

"Bill! Ralph! Come 'round this way with the stretcher." The paramedic called for his co-workers to join him.

"Is the fool, OK? 'Cos I don't hear nothin' comin' out of his crazy mouth." B.A asked, craning his neck to get a look at the still form of his friend.

"He's unconscious at the moment, but he'll be alright once we get to him to a hospital." The paramedic answered, hoping it would satisfy the bad-tempered man.

"Good. But if anything bad happens to him, you'll have me to answer to." B.A threatened the man, who wisely decided to keep quiet afterwards. Despite his low regard for the pilot's mental state, it was almost touching to the paramedic to see how much B.A cared for Murdock's well-being.

Having opened the door closest to the pilot, the two paramedics that had just arrived; Bill and Ralph were ready to transport Murdock. Taking care to support Murdock's neck with the corner of his elbow to prevent further injury, the paramedic already on-board the cockpit lifted Murdock into his arms and placed him on the stretcher carried by his co-workers.

Walking over unsteady, rock covered terrain, where the probability of tripping with one wrong step was high. Bill and Ralph somehow made it safely across the stream and loaded the stretcher on to the medical helicopter they had arrived on.

One down. Five to go.

"Aren't you going to eat that?" The nurse gestured to the mound of mashed potatoes on Murdock's plate, made to resemble a person with the addition of peas as facial features and a head of hair.

"The mashed potatoes were feelin' sad, so I gave 'em a smile to make 'em feel better." Murdock explained his creation, with a wide smile of his own.

"I liked the jelly though. 'Cos it looks the way I feel… in my head. All _wobbly_ like." Murdock added, which the nurse believed without question. The man with the broken neck was in need of a different kind of treatment altogether.

Four beds across from Murdock, Face was trying to spread some cheer.

"You know the bright side to all this? Free food and accommodation. After sleeping in that van for two days, a hospital room is like a luxury hotel." Face said out loud to no one in particular.

"There's only one downside to all this… My foot really _itches_." Face finished, making everyone in the room groan. For three days, the A-Team had to put up with Face's constant complaining about his itchy foot. As the second furthest person from him, even Murdock had enough of it.

"Face, you're a real pain in the neck, you know that? And I should know because I broke mine!" The normally amicable Murdock pointed out the annoyance that Face had become.

"You didn't break your neck Murdock, you got whiplash. I thought the doctors explained it to you." Amy corrected Murdock

"Come on, guys. I'm not that-"

"They explained it to me alright, but I wasn't listening too closely. I just tuned it out. " Murdock replied honestly to Amy, talking over Face's denials.

"See? Even Murdock agrees. I say we take a vote. All in favour of Face never talking about his ' _itch_ ' again raise your hands." Hannibal announced a vote. He wasn't allowed to smoke his cigars inside the hospital, which took the 'fun' out of the long bedrest needed to recover. But at least he now had a say in ending a certain irritation.

"The ones still intact that is." Hannibal added, remembering Amy and Jackie's broken hands.

Then, everyone but Face's hands rose, coming to an agreement that would ensure their stay in the hospital was a little less unpleasant.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading my story! I felt like Til Death Do Us Part could use a little one-shot to show the story of how Face annoyed the others talking about his itch.**

 **Plus I wanted an excuse to write about Murdock using food to mess with the nurse and to use a moment that happened in my life (putting peas on potatoes like a snowman) in a story.**


End file.
